Eating mushrooms indicriminately does not pay

As I sit here typing this, I can hear you, Gentle Reader, say, "Another Caledon aetherial journal? Whatsoever for? Caledon needs this like it needs another Mad Scientist, or another exploding chicken!" Indeed, I am hard-pressed to think of a good reason why you should spend your time reading, Sir or Madam - you likely have plenty of things to do, and many ways to occupy your time if you do not.


The reason you should spend your valuable time with me and this aetherial journal is...no, I've got nothing. Except, perhaps, that I can occasionally entertain. I can't juggle sharp blades (well, I can, just not for more than a few seconds, and surely a trip to the emergency room will result). And I can't tell jokes to save my life (I always forget the punch line). But perhaps I can occasionally amuse.


You see, I'm fairly new in Caledon. I've met a lot of wonderful people, including several Mad Scientists who turn out to be quite lovely folks once you get to know them (and no, I'm not going to embarrass any of them...they have reputations to maintain, you know). I've met builders and scripters, texturers (if that's a word - and if it isn't, it should be), shopkeepers and gardeners. Aviators. Tinies. Furries. Tiny furries. They have all taught me a great deal. And this journal will be about none of them, except perhaps in passing. Why? Because I'm a horrible ego-maniac, so self-centered that I can't possibly write about other people. No, that's not it (well, perhaps that is it, but not the only it, so to speak). It's because these folks know a great deal about our fair land while, being new here, I know practically nothing. Now I ask you, what is more entertaining: someone who knows it all, or someone who knows nothing?

For Exhibit A, I give you...


Yes, that's me, having just nibble - nibbled, mind you - a little mushroom. Morte velox, I believe it was called. (What? Speak up, Dear Reader in the back. You're telling me that any idiot knows that "Morte" is Latin for "death"? Hmm, this is what comes from daydreaming during class.) It's the kind of thing that wouldn't happen to a long-time Caledonian, an experienced Caledonian, a sensible Caledonian - in short, an unexciting Caledonian. Ergo, with me, entertainment!

In truth, I plan to post various accounts of life before Caledon. I've had certain adventure, my sister has had certain adventure (boy, has she ever!), my dear Mum and Da, gone many years now, have had their share of adventures. Some people are good, some are wicked. Some stories are funny, some are rather less so. But I hope all are entertaining.

Until next time, Dear Reader, don't eat the mushrooms!